I am so sorry mjv...
One of the very few personal downsides of long term sobriety is the many funerals I have attended...I will never get used to it....
Keep in mind that pride and shame are the hachetts of men...Unlike anger which often boasts and expells,,,these two swing at us from the inside..
Relapse is an integral part of recovery...If this thing called sobriety was easy it would have little value...
Humbly,
Lenny