I wasn't ALLOWED to be angry,sad, or frustrated as a kid. My parents beat me if I ever showed that I felt that way. I'm not an effective arguer&my bf&I are ALWAYS fighting this year. Every time I say I'm going to leave-sometimes at his request, sometimes because I feel like he doesn't want me here(I live in his house)he comes crying to me&begging me to let us work on the relationship when what he really means is I need to change&he never does ANYTHING to escalate the situation. Today I left the room to get away from him because I was tired of him yelling at me&he came upstairs&argued with me for 2 hours. I kept repeating "I don't want to fight." Then he'd say something to enrage me&it would start all over again. I know I should just give up&leave, but I'm disabled&in no state to go back to work&if I work I risk losing my disablity benefits that I fought 3years&$5000 for. No one will offer me a couch, my family doesn't care&no one will rent to me because I don't have a job. I vent at my shrink's office, but I never get any guidance on how to work through my anger&get all of this fighting to stop. I'm still angry&I don't know how not to keep from hating my bf for always attacking me about any&every thing.