I have not talked much about it. I have talked about how hurtful it was to be married to a guy with such a low sex drive, who rarely wanted sex. And I've talked about how I felt alienated one time by T's talk of another couple he was working with, in which the guy wanted sex more frequently than the woman. This story made me feel aberrant, like this was the norm, that the husband always wants sex more than the wife. T just acted like it was so common when he told that story. I have frequently felt quite down when I hear that stereotype in the media (the wife with a headache, avoiding sex again, or whatever) or in jokes or from friends. I know my boss once joked to me about her H wanting sex and her being sleepy and just wanting to rollover, and say "not now, not again!" I just felt like wow, I have no idea what that "problem" feels like and I would give my eyeteeth to have a guy in bed with me who wanted to have sex! Anyway, T and I have explored that. T helped by telling me he works with a number of couples where the woman wants sex more frequently than the guy, so he helped normalize that for me. It just made me feel so bad to think here was just one more area where my relationship was aberrant, so it's good to know that the female-high-libido/male-low-libido is not uncommon for other couples too. We haven't talked about fantasies (of the sexual kind) or anything. I don't think that is relevant to my therapy at this time. I would be quite put off if out of the blue he said, "tell me your fantasies." I would think WTF, and how does this relate to anything?

I do remember another time telling T how I was upset that my H had revealed some of my past sexual history to my teenage girls, rather graphically, with me sitting right there. I was extremely uncomfortable with that and we explored that. I remember one thing my H told my girls was about my fling with a Greek sea captain, and T said, why would he tell them that? (He was thinking this was a fabrication, that sunny would not have a fling with a Greek sea captain.) Well, that was true, I said, and it was funny to catch T in thinking that I would not have done such a thing. His stereotype shattered!

I'm not sure even what the question means have you talked about sex with your T. Do the things I wrote count? Or do people talk about very graphic stuff?