I know you've already got tons of advice here...but I feel compelled to add mine. I was married for 12 years to a man I wasn't in love with. Although he wasn't physically abusive he wasn't a good husband and he cheated the whole time. I stayed because i thought it was what was right for my son. I wanted him to have stability that I didn't have growing up. But secretely I hated him and my spirit was just gone. I had lost myself and I was miserable. when I finally made the decision to leave I did it one day that I knew he would be gone all day. when he came home, my stuff and I and our son were gone. I knew if he'd been there or I'd told him ahead of time that he'd never let me leave. he played soooo nice...He changed and started taking care of our son when he had him...taking him to church, doing tons of things he never did before...to prove to me that he'd changed... I got gifts and flowers delivered to my job every day.... my son chose to live with him because things were going so great and he'd never had that with his dad. My heart was broken because I was the one that had always been there for him, yet he chose his dad??!! it was the hardest thing I've ever been through. Lots of tears and lots of medication to help with the major depression it caused. he also tried to turn my son against me, was threatening me, harrassing me all day every day after he realized I wasn't coming back. it worked for a while, but it's been a year and a half and my son now is begging to live with me he hates his dad because his true colors are back to the surface while I have been constant loving and mothering him just as I always have. I never talked down to him about his dad..he saw for himself and realized that I wasn't the bad person his dad made me out to be. Now things are so wonderful, I've found myself again, I'm happier and healthier and my son is on his way to being with me again. Stick with it.. it's going to be hard...very very hard, but take it from me..it's all worth it.