Hi Tifferific. boy I can hear you .

You get really sick so your afraid If you start to get involved with people here That may affect them in some way as in burden them because you know just what a mamouth of a problem it is to overcome . Or they may leave . Your very afraid to hurt and or dissapoint others aren't you? Your afraid to over whelm them with whats so over whelming . And your afraid to once again not be helped.

Gosh I have heard those very words a few times i was right .Therapists will never know what its truly like unless they have been there . They can help you find your own way by asking the probing questions the ones that may unlock the conundrum. Thats all they can do . The rest is up to you.

One individiual here asked a leading question. Why is it or what is it thats kept and is keeping you from getting over this. Or shoud I say a steady consistant period of being able to abstain. Why hasn't that happened yet .


There may be something your afraid of finding out . Maybe that something is a reason behind why you don't think your worth getting better . It can go deeper Tifferific. Very creative name you got there I can put a tinge of sarchasam while saying it .

Heres a recap of some statements from all your posts.

<DIV>
> I'm not upset I usually push everyone away anyway. I am just so tired of my ed and tryin to get help?

>Well I went YEARS without anyone reaching out to me bla bla bla

>Anyway,people did SEE my pain the people that you want to hurt notice but they don't take resposibility. That's your job.

>They get upset, for a liitle while but they can't change you. noone can make this better. There's only you and tha's only if YOU care. You can talk forever

> keep on trying until someone listens and don't give up on yourself.





Gosh that emoticon makes me laugh... Im glad you hung on . You worked and have worked so very hard.

I don't tell others about my past or my eating disorder . And when it comes to making very close friends I bail because i don't want to have to expalin.And I have been rejected once I share . And some become scared and ashamed of being with me. It like Im being bullied again.

So None of my customers know . no one really . Not any more till here on this forum. Not in the detail I have shared . Not easy but know one knows who I am here .

any way . One day I was out working for a customer who has a stereo system that plays music outside . I hit me pretty deep and still does .

Telling first line in the song.

"it must have been "

in a kinda wondering way .

we know more than wondering Tifferific

Aurora

Wind beneath My wings By Bette Midler.

Bette Midler - Wind Beneath My Wings - Music Video