Thanks for coming in here, Star. It's nice to know you're still alive and at least doing half way ok. (((starbright)))

Well, I talked to my T and I talked to David. Both said I need to attend more AA and/or NA meetings than usual and that should help with the desire a little and I need to get a better phone contact system to call people at any given time when I need them. I only have two numbers and I don't like waking people up who have families in the middle of the night, so I just sit alone and cry.

I messed up. *cry* I took 12 Klonipons. I know that's not falling off the wagon completely, but it still hurts me and the guilt is so bad. I don't know why I gave in, pills weren't even what I was dreaming about... I feel so weak. I feel so alone. I feel so sufficated.