I am so sorry (((((((((((((((((((Ozark Loves)))))))))))))))). It's so hard when our illness affects the people we love so much, especially our children. As I look back, I can see so many times when my children suffered due to my illness. While it wasn't my fault that I had it, it doesn't negate the fact that they sometimes didn't get what they needed.

Are you in therapy or do you have support? I hope your daughter will realize how much you care for her and your grandchildren. One thing my T said was that I was not like "them" and that's one reason I have DID and the DID saved me so that I was not like "them."

I guess at this point, maybe the best thing to do is honor her request. If she can work through things and realize how much you care for her and the children, I hope she will allow you to see them. Perhaps she would be open to supervised visits at the very least?

We're glad you're here and hope you can get some good support.