i've never heard of "torture depression", either, and just found some vague references of it as an expression of dysthymia, in which sufferers feel like they are being worn down like by "mental water torture". but i'm having a hard time connecting it to your description, which is rather extreme. is this all mental pain, or is it physical, or is it psychosomatically-induced physical pain? surely something must give you some comfort, as i'd wonder if such constant torture wouldn't cause some kind of mental break if it went on so long...?