thanks for the reply,ss.  you didn't mention if you had considered AA. that is where i found the support i needed. if you need a ride someone will come and pick you up for a meeting. it will be a recovering person who wants to help the next person who wants to get sober and stay sober. (request a woman to pick you up.) AA hotline numbers are in the phone book, if you want to try my suggestion. make sure you call alcoholics anonymous. some other numbers can be misleading. i will pray for you. stay strong and don't lose hope.
as for will power..we alcoholics are not successful with will power alone. that is why we need to help each other. 
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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