Hello, Jack. I'm terribly sorry you are going through this with your wife. It must be hard to be the one that is there for someone with a mental illness. I've been diagnosed with Bipolar I so I can't imagine what it's like on the other end. One thing I DO know is that it cannot be easy. Sometimes I myself wonder how I'm to put up with myself.
My husband also goes through a lot of the problems with me. Luckily for me, he doesn't hold most of it against me. He understands, and has even researched the disorder, for me. I, myself, haven't been diagnosed all that long ago and I'm still learning how to live with it. I was put on medication and it made me a zombie. I wouldn't want my worst enemy to live like that.
Point is...it's a hard thing to go through and see. Especially with someone you love like your wife. To hear her say she doesn't feel loved may not be anything that's in the slightest your fault. It could be her disorder talking. In my mind I know my husband loves me but at other times I can't grasp it. It's hard to explain.
I hope all goes well and you and your wife get past this. Good luck, Jack and take care. God bless you and your wife.