((Pookie))

Welcome!

All of the other posters had really great input. Definitely pay attention to your intuition.

When an emotionally abusive partner raises the issue of suicide, it is often 'emotional blackmail'. If he leads you to believe that if you kick him out he won't make it -- red flags should go up. Do not engage or try to talk him out of it. Call one of his friends to come help him, or call the police if necessary.

If you decide to fix things, I would consider getting yourself some outside help. A therapist can be very useful to help you navigate the process, and offer a safe place to talk about all the emotions that will likely come up.

I really appreciate your desire to help him. As long as you put up with his abusive behaviors, he has no reason to change. By setting firm boundaries for yourself, up to and including asking him to leave, you will be helping him more than if you try to fix him.

Love him, by loving yourself. You absolutely deserve to feel safe in your home, to have a partner who is emotionally available, and who can carry you when you need some extra support.