I just received papers from my mortgage company offering to do a loan remodification, but they need $1725 by 1/9/09....which I don't have but my folks are lending to me. However, I still have to fill out paperwork and it has to be approved and I have been praying for something like this to happen. I am so happy but nervous nervous nervous. I should be thinking yippee! but instead I'm thinking, "they won't approve it." "I KNOW they won't approve it." "something will go wrong". I can't get the negative thoughts to go away, though I want them too. I can't stop shaking and looking in fear at these papers....which I never would have had the courage to open if a friend hadn't sat with me while I did it. Plus there's the whole borrowing money from my parents. I feel like a loser for having to do it and I know there will come a lecture--there's always a lecture (though I don't know what they find to lecture about because I have no extra's no credit cards nothing...it's usually just about my personal life!) Anyway!!!! I need help with CBT...it isn't working and I just need other input and someone to maybe type it out for me. I'm sorry. Thank you.