There was a true dichotomy in how I was raised. My mother was physically and emotionally abusive to me. My dad was largely non-present, burying himself in religion, forcing us to go to Church each Sunday, though his interactions with me and my sister were not loving or fatherly. He never intervened in the abuse, just enabled her, and told us "not to upset her."
My dad suffered from depression. Mom too, though they dealt with it in different ways. Looking back, I adopted religion as a way of gaining his approval and love.
Now I'm pretty much non-religious. I see a lot of behavioral issues related to this upbringing. Mostly desperation.
"You turn the tap on and water flows; you start the ignition in your car, and it starts." These are mechanical inventions, not works of faith.
I have largely come to feel that prayer is talking to oneself. Sorry, I know this sounds cynical and harsh. Faith is belief in something outside yourself. Not sure now that it's based on reality.
Patty