This is so hard. Tonight I am majorly craving anything that will give me a high. I feel exhausted but cant sleep, am anxious and agitated and edgy. I have a naughty thought in my mind telling me it would be ok to get a little high, that it wouldnt hurt anyone, that i should just do it. But im staving it off with coffee and cigs.

Found a great opiate dependance forum and posted there too. Getting some responses from other long time hardcore opaite abusers... some who have come clean after many years. Its uplifting and giving me hope.

I just cant get comfortable in my own skin.