Quote:
Originally Posted by MissCharlotte
I had a decent session back today---no fights, no ruptures. I feel really sad and somehow I am translating this as if I need a break from therapy. I can't seem to hit a stride where I feel even a little bit good coming out of there. I always leave feeling bad about myself, or overwhelmed or like I did something wrong. As I integrate those part of myself that I split off years ago I feel worse. I am beginning to think that being unintegrated was a better place for me. I have no confidence anymore and my sense of who I am is full of holes. I can see through myself. Maybe I need a break.
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Yes we have to feel worse before we can feel better...as my T always reminds me, that I am stronger now and more able to feel the feelings as awful as they feel....we have to know where we've been to find where we going too...you are not fall of holes as much as the false parts off you are dying and its the loss of those parts that served you well once but not any more that you are grieving...it is always darkest just before the dawn...if therapy were about hop skip and jumping I think it would be a very shallow affair?? Perhaps?
