Quote:
Originally Posted by phoenix7
letting people in is dangerous - I may be hard on the outside but i am soft as butter on the inside - unsure of everything - insecure (much as i hate to admit it) and .... vulnerable (oooh I so want to say NOT NOT NOT! - but that wouldnt be true and i am trying to be "real" here - that's a good word - real - i wish i knew what that was - and mostly i am afraid, afraid of ..lets just say it - rejection and the pain it will bring - dumb, dumb, dumb, ive dealt with that enough as a child i should be an expert by now!
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I can certainly understand what you have explained here. So you feel vulnerable and you are afraid of rejection. Again, normal responses considering what you have been through. I would think that it would be helpful to learn how to protect yourself first before you let others close. Protecting yourself first involves believing that you have the right to protect yourself and that you will do it everytime that you need to. If something holds you back from protecting yourself (like not believing that your needs can come before others) then you need to deal with this first. After this then being able to size people up and know when they are safe or not.
I think that healing from this past rejection is important too by talking about it with your therapist.