IM SICK OF THIS ********!!!!!!!!!!!

I hate it. I hate being me, I hate how I drive everyone away, I hate how I cant ask for GOD DAMN help when I ****ing need it. Im driving myself insane I dont know what to do with myself. I dont even know why im writing. I dont know what to write I just need to rant since I CANT TAKE IT OUT ON MYSELF SEEING AS A CERTAIN SOMEONE MADE ME THROW MY SISSORS AWAY. I hate this rage I have inside me I need to lash out Im so ****ing mad with myself