*hugs tao*
I'm glad you're safe for now.
I want you to feel better.
Don't give up everything you've been working for. When in the past I've gotten very dark thoughts I lose sight of what I'm looking for. My mind lies to me and takes only the bad into account. I twist things. I know things are bad. But it's easy to lose sight of the good when we are like this.

Take a rest, if you can. Give yourself treats. Simple things.
Some responses here mentioned that you can't do anything at home, that you're going back to school... is that true?
If so... well I'm at home now and it makes things HORRIBLE for me... keep in mind if this is true that you are in a location that doesn't help you, and that you're not there forever. A few weeks may seem a long time, full of torture and pain, but you can make it. I know you can. You've made it through before, you can again. It's hard when you can't see the goal. Remember the goal can be seen again though it will take time.

Loads of hugs
I'm sorry if I lost you in the post

I care about you, I hope you'll be ok, if there's anything I can do let me know.