i'm starting to lose all my hope
all i want to start this year off is with happiness
but that can't even happen, i don't ever feel happy anymore
i haven't had one of those lucky random happy days in a while
im afraid of losing everything
i am actually terrified
i feel like im living my life in fear
i dont want to live like this anymore

does anyone else feel the way i do? because all of this doesn't feel real to me. i feel like no one should have to feel this way. its hurts.