Quote:
Originally Posted by imapatient
Yes, the complexity of it all. We didn't even get to talk about it, though. I wrote about it elsewhere, but it wasn't really her or about her----long story. I wish we could've explored what happened and what was behind it. It related to my main abuse issue, something she and I were working on at that moment. I was acting out as a coping mechanism for something that had just happened in my life. Termination I understand, the process and reason(s) don't make sense.
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i think it is safe to say that she terminated therapy in a way which was not helpful to you. that much is obvious.
what isn't clear is what her thoughts about you were. i dont think you can be certain that she was scared of you, or thought you were a monster, or whatever... yknow? i used to work at a telephone counselling service, and one of our clients developed an unhealthy fixation with me. would call whenever i was on and generally just want to have phone sex. i tried being assertive with him a few times, calling him on his issues etc, but eventually (with supervision) i eventually just had to let it go - stop accepting his calls altogether.
i wasn't scared of him, or disgusted by him, or anything, really. i dont have negative thoughts about him to this day. if anything, i feel a bit sorry for him - that that was his way of connecting - and hope that he has managed to find more productive ways of dealing with his issues. i also hope that my refusal to work with him anymore did not hinder him from seeking help elsewhere.
it's altogether possible that her lawyers advised her to stop contact with you immediately, and that she just followd through on that advice. seen in this light, it boils down to just one bad session (albeit an important session - termination - but just one session nonetheless). i am sure you've had sessions in the past where things did not go well? is it possbile for you to reframe it in this light?