I haven't driven by his house, although I know where he lives.

I HAVE looked at the website of his church and have seen pictures of him (on that website) doing a Habitat for Humanity build. And I figured out that he was on a men's retreat with his church when he told me ahead of time that he would be totally unavailable during a weekend in the first few months of therapy.

Personally, I told him about those things. I didn't want it hanging over my head, making me worry - although I knew there was no way he would ever figure out what I had done. He was not angry, alarmed, annoyed, or anything else. He just said "It sounds like you're trying to find a way to make sure you are safe" or something to that effect.

Looking back, he was probably right. Now that I've been in therapy with him for a long time, I don't feel the need to seek him out in the same way anymore. If I need him, I just e-mail or call him....and more and more often, I just know he's "there" and that's enough.