yeah im not trying to use it as an excuse. its just easier for me to "fix" it if i know why its happening. if it just happens, then i end up hating myself for being "crazy" and never really get anywhere. but i feel like if I can say "this started happening right after this occurance" its easier for me to also say "i know why I think this way and know that its not correct". you get my drift? thanks guys.