I can't do this.
Being with John has completely wrecked my head... I can't cope anymore, I wish I'd never met him, I wish I didn't care about people, I wish I didn't love.
I'm panicking, I can't breath, I'm just sat having a breakdown, shaking.
And I don't care if anyone thinks that I'm overreacting or anything, cause I'm not. I don't understand anything.
I can't do this
I thought I was handling it ok until I heard one of his brothers songs (he's in a band) and I know I can't do this. He was so important to me... He said it to, even after he broke up with me. But, none of what he said makes sense.I'm just gonna beat myself up because of his mum forever.
And it's not healthy no... that's why I've been trying to tell myself that I can never be with him, or see him, or be mates with him and that I've gotta get on with life without him.
But, he's there... in my head, everyday, every night.

i'm grieving. I hurt so bad.
I'm sorry