This thought is resounding in my head over and over and over again and it's seriously sounding like such a good idea.. Even if I have been 49 days without it.. I just can't take much more crap.. I went out the other day and one of the girls here said "Watch out, Kirsten, there are bad men out there" It makes me sick. And the other day I walked past her and she coughed and said somehing under her breath. Most likely "Slag". Then I found out that the witness of the rape has been saying she's going to "bang me out" and so has someone that said she was on my side, to my face, but to the witness, she said she'd join her in beating me down to the ground. Huh. They can beat me to a pulp for all I care. They'll be the ones getting charged for assault and getting kicked out of here. It just scares me.. I don't feel safe at all anymore..

I can't stand this much longer, I'm ill as it is, my mental state's deteriorating, my life is a shambles, I have no job, can't talk to people, can't spend time with people because I'm socially retarded because of being afraid of people laughing at me, not with me, for instance.

The reason I have no job? Because no-one will accept me because of the reputation of people in this place. Druggies, alcoholics, lazy people who don't wanna get off their arses and earn an honest penny, just want to be on benefits for the rest of their life to make it easy for them, rude.. Etc etc. It's really wrong.

I hate this, I really do.. I can't stand being in this s**thole anymore, it's ruining my life!