My Support Forums - View Single Post - Watching Someone You Care About Disappear

scooterb · 08:36 PM

:Thanks for the feedback. I know the suggestions and advice are for a reason - because they are valid. Dating someone new to recovery is not recommended and I understand the reason. I felt that I was maintaining my boundaries and integrity, though. Perhaps, not. I don't believe in victimization. So I am responsible and accountable for my actions and I feel proud of my behavior. Every action has a consequence. I don't believe I caused this person any harm nor did I distract or meddle in his recovery. If anything I was an example of a good friend, someone who could listen and not be judgmental while continuing to put my recovery before all else. I lent the money because I felt in my heart I was helping someone who was strapped financially. Others have helped me in the past and I try to live in a place of "pay it forward" while staying out of the land of stupidity. So, I think the money karma will benefit this addict in one way or the other. Would I do it again if I knew what was really going on, heck no!

I am not a victim in my living situation either. But I do have circumstances that I must accept because I don't have the finances, etc. to make a physical move to a place where I would be more comfortable and not have to put up with a manager with anger issues and probably psychological issues that are not being worked on. I'm learning each day about staying in the moment and enjoying the journey.
I appreciate all the support and understanding I got when I posted the other day. The ripped out gut feeling is going away because I stay in action. Going to my meetings, journaling, sharing with my inner support circle in AA and staying grateful.
This disease is indeed "cunning, baffling, and powerful."
Scooterb (Lisa)