Ryan, I'm trying to stay strong, but this guy gets to me. He'll act nice and friendly and start telling me about his financial woes and then I feel guilty about taking him back to court and maybe getting child support out of him. He talks about needing to budget but it doesn't stop him from having parties and buying drinks for his friends every week at bowling. If he can't prioritize so the kids get the things they need, I feel like I don't have a choice but to go for child support. Then the money will be allotted for them, not entertainment. His reasoning in the past has been "I'm not going to let the kids get in the way of my social life."

I was sticking up for him yesterday when my son was saying he was going to demand that his dad buy him some shorts this weekend. I told him not to be too hard on his dad since it's tax time and money is probably tight.

Geeez, if I don't have the balls to say "Yes, make sure dad gets you some warm weather clothes" that might cost $50 for a couple of things, HOW am I going to feel about maybe getting hundreds of dollars a month? I didn't want my son to go over there and start demanding and getting smart mouthed because his dad refuses, and then get yelled at and have privileges taken away. So I tell him not to rock the boat instead of expecting him to get things that he deserves.

I just went halves on a new bike, bought him some tennis shoes, and picked up an a new outfit including shoes for my daughter last weekend. It's not like I expect their dad to buy them everything, but he won't take them shopping; he waits until they demand, and then he feels put out that he has to spend money on such unimportant things like clothes.

He wants to talk budget, he needs to talk to me. It's more than buying 2 L bottles of soda instead of 12 packs. It's looking for deals on EVERYTHING. Thank goodness I actually find bargain shopping fun (but it IS getting a little tiresome to not be able to buy everything we need and having to prioritize constantly).

Sorry for the whiny rant. Money's tight for me too, but the kids don't go without the things they need when they're with me. They might not get everything they want, but the necessities are covered. Since money's an issue on my end, I'm afraid to stand up to him on that issue because I know how I'd feel if he tried to get money from me. You can't get blood out of a turnip, you know?

However, I can't drop the case because I'm fighting for more than just money. I'm fighting to get things revised that he blackmailed me into agreeing to, and THOSE things need to be reversed. I'll go weeks staying in the frame of mind of standing up to him, and then he'll call and be chatty and friendly and all fight instincts disappear.