i don't know what i'm going to do.
i still have insomnia... i don't know why...
uni resumes monday... i haven't gotten anywhere on my incompletes over break... my mind feels dead and my thoughts are so slow, dark, apathetic.
every day i go to school i have ample opportunity for jumping... which i obsess over.
i can see my t again with classes resuming... but i feel so hopeless... and my thoughts aren't coming well...
i feel so horrible, so hopeless. everything piles on... the incompletes, the new semester, the stuff to graduate, the hospital bills, no income from december, state aid denial, i lost my dog-friend and still miss her badly, i feel so alone, i wish someone would say something to me, i need to find a job, plans for after school if it comes, plans for my loans, plans for treatment then, now i have a gross cold and my monthly... and i just want to die. but i don't want to hurt my family, i don't want to die by my own hand, but i can't keep on like this.
i don't know what to do.