Hangingon, maybe this is related to the loss of your mom and what is going on with your family. Do you think you could talk with your T about the email you sent to her? Maybe start with the mix of feelings you were experiencing following her death. Then as you discuss how you felt you might say something about still kind of feeling like you have no purpose.

Feeling like you on this earth for some reason other than to suffer is REALLY important. I'm not particularly religious, but I am thankful that some how I learned the concept of faith and that I am on this earth to add my small contribution to something that I may not always understand.

As a teacher do you ever remember providing something to a student or parent that only YOU being there at that moment could have provided? Certainly the professions you've chosen Education and Nursing indicate that you've been called to serve humanity in some capacity. Even if you don't see a purpose for your life... I think everyone is here for a reason...even the infant that only survives for a few hours, came to bring SOMETHING to this world. Sorry for getting metaphysical here.