Thanks guys....There are a couple worries though that I still have (of course). One- She is just saying these things so I do not divorce her and she has money coming from me. Two- If I do go home and see her and try to reconcile, then it starts the seperation ALL over again. I tried that before in Aug and I remember her saying that she needed the divorce my last full day with her before I came to Iraq.
I told her that I am afraid of her using me for just money and she said that after we get divorced, she will start her career and show that she WANTS me and doesn't NEED me. I was happy about that because it shows that she (at least says) that she wants to get rid of my fears.
The other night (during our two hour phone conversation and no yelling this time! Yay!), she said that I said I wanted the divorce on my final day there. If said that, then why would I have wasted all that time on leave with her and going to theray? Granted sometimes my memory isnt 100% accurate, but I think I would remember that.
The senior people above me know of the situation and they have expressed their concearn that if I were to continue the marriage, I would only end up getting hurt again and go and drink my career away in the military, which they have seen too many times with other men. They haven't told me what to do, only what the safe be would be.
On a side note, I started talking to another girl online and she reminds me SO much of my wife that it is scarey. Both the bad and good. The new girl Jennifer, is really wanting to be with somebody, and has told me that if I wasn't married when I came home and I told her I wanted to get married, she would! I was like WHOA!!!.....This new girl is great (from what I can tell), but it feels alot like my wife (minus the infedelity part). Both have "emotional baggage", new girl was a rape victim, has been cheated on by a serious bf/fiance, who was in the military. I like the new girl, but its scarey how fast she wants to move. BTW, the wife does not know I have been talking to this new girl. I feel bad for doing it too....I wasn't even looking for somebody....she just messaged me outta the blue one day...apparantly we used to talk years ago..i dont remember her tho