Well he tried to give me an explanation .. but some of it was just BS random stuff (I am too extroverted, too liberal for his family, blah blah). What it basically came down to, I believe, was that he became bored. We moved in together and life became the day-to-day routine, the honeymoon stage was over, therefore he assumes he's not in love anymore. Funny, I just felt like we were getting to the good part - feeling totally safe with one another, feeling like the other was "home".

The thing is, I honestly feel like I know the kid better than he knows himself. I don't think any explanation he gave me would be right, because I don't think he even understands himself. He is just a bit confused and I believe deep down his self-esteem is very low.

He has told me it's over. I have moved out, missed the holidays with the family, and have not heard from him in a month. The problem here is that I don't know that it really is truly over. Part of me thinks maybe this is false hope, but the other part of me really feels like I know him so well that he will realize this is not what he really wants. But I just need to accept what he is telling me, because anything else is just speculation.

I LOVE being in a relationship. So now that I'm single the boys are banging down the doors, and it's hard for me not to accept their advances. I know that I am not ready to get into anything serious, but I wonder what the harm is in at least dating? The problem is, I am such a loyal person ... when I talk with a new guy, I really feel like I'm betraying my ex, which is just ludicrous when he has let me go. I will go so far to say that if someone else asked me to be his girlfriend, I might even contact the ex to see if it's okay.

Listening to myself, it sooo doesn't seem fair for any new guy to have to be involved with this. But then again, I'm not getting any younger, and if he says it's over (and obviously is acting like it is), am I really supposed to sit in my room and wait for someone who may never come?

This is the by far the worst thing I have ever had to deal with in my life. It's horrible to say, but I think it would have been easier for me if he had died.