hey, we all lie in some way or the other. figuring out why i do it and then simply correcting that insecurity helps. sometimes i can't go past the insecurity and so continue but i feel i know why and that helps. get down to the root, know thyself. try to come clean in case your T can provide you with more sound pro help... give him a chance!
and perhaps if you and hubby could try joint counselling - perhaps you could both 'out' the negative energy and channel the positive love into your marriage. yeah, if life were that simple, but i'm trying to provide an outsider's perception. i'm hoping things go well for you. it's just a vicious cycle you're in, break it and then take control of those ares that hamper your progress. i somehow think you're an amazing person who needs that self validation to break away from some negativity. Be your own best friend!