im not religious. i dont believe in a higher anyone or anything. Please refrain from that sort of talk as it is highly triggering - especially talk of god or churches, etc. There is a spirituality forum for that. If you wish to send nontheistic blessings then they are humbly accepted with gratitude. I wish you well in your own journey. edit: i dont mean that to sound mean or cold... just self-care

bizi, you know i love you to bits... i know you understand babe.. weve been around this block for a long time.

cyber, ty for understanding and actually listening to what i said. That's what support is about, listening... i used to journal more than i do now. It got too intense.

i came to seek compassion bc i have come to face the fact that some of my obstacles are there for the long haul... not possible to change them any more than a person can grow a leg if they were born without one... i looked into that pool that is deep within and i saw how there are parts that canot be healed or changed. It is what i am despite my sadness for that. One cannot change one's chemical make-up entirely.

my T is a good man... but there is a gap right now... and i havent even told him yet. i dont see any point in it as i know it cannot be closed. i know it. He stands firm on an issue and i cannot agree with him... there is no middle ground. That creates a break in the alliance.