I met my recent bf 5 months ago,we talked all day everyday. Mostly through text and mostly him keeping up the convo's and initiating the contact. we saw eachother 2-3 times a week. I was crazy about him, I loved being around him, he's the first guy I've actually enjoyed sex with (I've slept with 11 guys) I even just love his natural scent-everything about him i loved. I thought I FINALLY found "the one".

After a month, I started getting clingy, jealous and angry at him for little things. It turned around to ME being the one texting him all the time. I got really jealous that he still talked to his ex,I asked him to cut her out of his life..even though I had no suspicions or reasons to believe there was anything going on. He works long hours, so dosen't get much free time, but I would get mad all the time about him not spending enough time with me, not being romantic enough and so on. We had only been together at that point for a little over a month..I realized it's ridiculous for me to act that way to someone I've only been dating for that short of time.. but I couldn't help it.

After 2 months he broke it off.Said we fought too much,i get angry too easily, dosen't see it going anywhere. I feel like I totally ruined everything. He insisted on staying friends, at first I said no, he seemed upset by that.. but I found that I can't stay away from him, so i accepted a friendship.

I was devastated by the break up. Since we've broken up over 2 months ago we've hung out as friends about once a week and we STILL talk everyday.. mostly me texting him first. He says its too much and dosent want to talk everyday, but I just cant help it. I feel anxious when not in constant contact with him..I'm not satisfied unless we're texting back and forth from the moment we wake up until the moment we go to sleep. And i KNOW it's not realistic for couples or friends to be in constant contact, yet i get that anxious feeling and i get mad at him and accuse him of not caring or not wanting to talk to me. Yet, he insists he does.

I keep hoping that he'll take me back and want to try again. He says he dosen't have feelings for me,but I think he does.Even as friends I act all crazy jealous and clingy. I know he gets frusterated with me when I act like that, which is on a regular basis.. so I think if he's not cutting off contact with me, a part of him must think i'm worth the head ache. One night (about a month after the breakup) he sent me texts saying that he missed me, wanted to see me that night but that he didnt want to bail on his friends, said he felt like he should be with me. the next day i asked him about it..said he only said those things because he was drunk and still wanted to remain as just friends. Ive always thought a persons true feelings come out when theyre drunk. at one point (while sober) he admitted he does have feelings but not feelings of love. I think he could have love feelings if i'd stop acting this way but its so hard.. i loose control. I have mild depression which i had under control but its been creeping back up on me the last year or so. I've told him this and i've told him i'm not quite feeling myself. i asked him if when im better and back to my old self if he thinks he'd want to date again. he said "i cant know for sure, but you never know" he said its hard to say because he's only seen this side of me.

I think we could be really great together, but i need to fix the way i been acting and stop being so clingy and keep my temper under control, i just dont know HOW. I do things to keep myself busy, I stick to my regular routine, I work 8 hours a day and I go to the gym, I have friends that I spend time with. i've tried just to stop texting him all the time, have tried letting the small things go but i CANT. Any advice? (besides seeing a therapist, as i'm already aware that I need help lol) I guess i'm just looking for a second oppinion as to how to stop acting this way and if anyone else thinks i have a chance or if i should just give up?

PS- I apologize for the long read.. I just felt that it's easier for ppl to give advice if they have all the details