I have cried some in therapy - usually when i do it is over something that looks like a rupture with t or my not being able to continue. It's rarely about *my* stuff or the abuse. T sent me an email last week saying "I will be glad when you can cry in therapy". @_@ Seemed odd. I hate crying in therapy - in front of ppl. And maybe it does stem from childhood when my dad refused to let my mom pick me up as an infant when i cried - said i'd be spoiled. Mom held me all the time when he was out of the house, but when he was home i was left alone in my crib. As a toddler, I was not allowed to make any noise, so I was not allowed to be in the room with him when i played (or ever growing up, for that matter). TV was more important to him. I also was born early and cried for 6 weeks straight - which wasn't "allowed" and mom wasn't allowed to get any sleep - so she stayed up with me in my room while he slept in theirs. By day, mom was expected to clean the house make his meals... have dinner on the table by 5... and mind the baby with no help. She wanted to kill me. I think I learned some adaptive skills after about 3 on how to survive that house... i was a little on the slow side i guess... 6 years of therapy (not all with this t) and I still shove all my feelings in.