((mandazzle)))can you pm one of the moderators about what is bothering you so badly if you can't talk about this here? do you have a pdoc or T? let me know. we care for you.  you can also pm me.
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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