Ok I have been terrified of men my whole life. I used to think they were all smelly perverts who spit on the sidewalk. Yucky and gross. However my T has been telling me that not all men smell like chilie and beer and they dont all spit in front of women. She said some smell like soap like her husband and care about stuf that you care about. So I have been more open to looking. So I am not an expert but the other day i saw a man sitting by the river his camera eqiupment a few stairs above him and he was sitting there looking at the water. I wanted to go down and ask him what are you thinking about? What do you see as you look at the river? Do you see its beauty in its imperfectio (its swollen and messy from the recent 17 inches of snow and then rain). I wanted to talk to him about stuff. So maybe these men are just the men you pick. If you pick a man who finds you so pretty he wants you for that then maybe he will find somone else later after you start to want more. Maybe you could find a man sitting by a river quietly thinking. A man who has deeper thoughts then how pretty you are. I am not an expert but I have a lot of knowledge about human beings. Maybe you could look for a man at something like a plant club or a college classs for extended learning. I knwo they have classes for walking though woods or meadows or something like that. Then slowly approach him and smell him if he smells like beer or chili run away.

love stephanie