Kudos on your forgiveness experience. You might check this book out on the topic. I haven't read it, but the blurb sounds interesting.

google this title to read an excerpt -- Forgive for Good - by Fred Luskin - 240 pages

excerpt from an article on the author

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Luskin himself chose to study forgiveness for his doctoral dissertation after his closest friend dropped him abruptly to pursue other parts of his life.

His search for ways to cope with the hurt led him to develop the Stanford Forgiveness Project, which already has provided training to hundreds of people. Luskin has also authored a forthcoming book, "Forgive for Good."

Among the points emphasized in the training is that getting other people to do what you want is usually futile.

"All the huffing and puffing and groaning and moaning you might do isn't going to make somebody love you more or be fairer or kinder to you," Luskin said. "It's a poor strategy that people don't give up easily, but it is something that can be learned."

POSITIVE RESULTS

Initial research results, presented Friday at the APA, indicate that people who went through the six-week Stanford program were significantly more optimistic and willing to use forgiveness as a coping strategy months after the training ended, than people who had been randomly assigned to a control group.

Furthermore, those who had taken the training reported fewer backaches, headaches, muscle pains, stomach upsets and other common physical signs of stress, Luskin said.

The project has since been extended to include small groups of people from Northern Ireland, and Luskin said they are making plans to take their work to South Africa as well.

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ciao
Saafir