my reaction is along the same lines as sabby. the situation has gotten really murky...your fiance is not following healthy guidelines re her role as a caregiver, imho. i'm baffled by her behavior in this matter.
what sabby said re you is right on. otherwise you're giving mixed messages. also it sounds like this needs to be discussed by you two. you all can't move forward in your relationship without coming to a common resolution. sounds like the way things are now it's like the gigantic pink elephant in the living room. i hope you all can work it out. 
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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