gosh i'm so sorry this is happening to you.and glad you found our site. it's a caring community and i believe you will get the support you need here.
it sounds like to me that your husband has a sex addicition and perhaps a gambling addiction. i'm no doc but when anything we do becomes excessive and intereferes with our life and those around us..it's called an addiction. what he is doing is throwing the blame back on you where it doesn't belong when you approached him. he has become reckless with the family finances which in turn affects you and your daughter. he is reckless with leaving tapes around that no child should happen to put in a tv tape player.
this is just me, but i'd seek some advice from a divorce lawyer and separate your name from his regarding finances. difficult to do with you owning your own company, but i'm sure there is a way. credit cards, etc. if your state has a legal separation while you give him a chance to clean up his act, your choice, then the legal separation will protect your credit, etc. i don't believe this man plans on changing his ways. sorry.
i know others may offer some very different advice but since he doesn't want to participate in this marriage as a partner, i'd let him loose.
you and your daughter deserve better than what he is offering.