Okay, so my thoughts sort of went in a million different directions, lol! Here goes...

My first reaction was- wow this is extremely unhealthy. This song is about people who are so addicted to pain/death/negativity as their lot in life that they've decided this is the only beauty life holds for them.[***This interpretation might actually be what the song was aimed toward, knowing this band (gothic rock of the "pain + death= sexy" variety- name of the cd is razorblade romance) but I digress...]

Anyway, I could see how this fit many people I know- myself included, admittedly This epitomizes some of the biggest challenges I face, which would be my addiction to "drama" lol. My t talked about this theory she had, about how for a lot of people she sees in practice it seems that they are accustomed to this culture where we are encouraged to be restricted in our range of emotions. She said that she wonders if repressing our regular, healthy, range of emotions is what can often lead to needing dramatic and drastic reasons to throw us into total crisis in order to believe we have a "reason" or a "right" to *feel* And that's why we become addicted to engaging in drama and trauma- so we can allow ourselves some feeling instead of the constant "numb" that this culture tends to endorse(she was referring specifically to the area in which she works, but I think to a limited extent it does generalize to our U.S. culture, *somewhat*). Sort of like being subconsciously driven toward and seduced by drama, pain, crisis, and destruction in order to have a mode that's "acceptable" for releasing feelings. Am I making sense? Not sure if I explained that well. Anyway, that is ONE direction I took it in...

The other is sort of a more balanced take on life. And it also, in a slightly different way, comes in reaction to the extreme of going along with the idea that negative feelings and experiences are to be avoided completely. This would be living as what I like to call "surface dwellers"- the often culturally acceptable way of living in which we "don't have" strong negative feelings, and if we do, something is "wrong" with us. You know? Like not being able to see the value in painful situations and experiences. If you look at this song as a counter to that way of approaching life, you could say that this song is actually healthy in that it's about acknowledging that life involves pain and there can be beauty even in pain.

T has been teaching me about how *every* relationship involves some pain. This seems to be a difficult thing for me to work with, even though it's a reality. I guess the pattern in my life has been toward relationships that are BASED ON pain or relationships that are held together only by the ILLUSION of perfection and the illusion that there will be or is a LACK of pain. She is helping me to see that we can experience pain as a part of the relationship, and not jump ship NOR become so engrossed in that pain that it becomes what the relationship is "about". Hard stuff to learn.

Anyway, in that vein, to me this song can be a celebration of the fact that we're alive and we're loving, and thus we're going to feel pain. Not a celebration of or addiction to the pain itself (pain sucks!), but an understanding there is beauty in that whole process, and growth, and trust, and many a beautiful thing that comes along with the pain. It's not the same thing as being seduced or intoxicated by the pain, tho. Know what I mean?

Any thoughts???? I'm anxious to hear

(Sorry about the lenght of this post, too, btw )