Oh, can I relate to you, my friend. I'm on wellbutrin which is a stimulant. I've been taking it since Thanksgiving and for a short time felt the effect of the stimulant but only that it kept me awake. I didn't accomplish anything but I could stay up for 2 days. Now that I'm further into taking the drug I'm feeling exhausted. I don't get it. I took it today at 8am and was taking a nap by 10:30am and slept for 2 hours. Everything is an effort including answering the phone. Most of the time I let it go into voicemail. It's just easier. I know you feel like you have to be macho and it sounds like you take care of people by nature. Just so you know, many women find men who express emotions and expose their souls very attractive. It's not being girlie or anything; it's being honest and your wife will love that you trust her enough to be genuine and let her in. I hope you find something that lifts you out of the hole many of us seem to be in. I emptied the dishwasher today. I consider that a victory. A small one but a victory none the less. Be victorious. You can do it. Keep posting, you'll find lots of support here.