((((((((imapatient)))))))) i do hope you will return and read this thread. i couldn't agree with earth mama more. you are a person of value and worth. you are unique in this world we live in. please hang on...there can be wonderful things in your future. i know cause i have often felt like you in the past and by "sticking to it" i have the life i have now and it is beyond my imagination to describe.
i had to do some serious therapy work. going through the pain made me stronger. i came out the other side and discovered a whole new way of perceiving myself and others.
i lost my very, very, very best friend about 15 years ago. she gave up. i can't tell you how much i miss her. i was mad at first that she had left me. i was mad that she didn't reach out to me. we had always done that before. then i felt terrible sadness that she didn't wait for the good things awaiting her by getting help. i am sure there are people in your life right now, us for an example, that want you to continue to fight for your life and the peace of mind you deserve.
thank you for being willing to share these thoughts and feelings you have right now in this forum. it enables us to support you in your quest for getting better.