We get along great, and part of me doesn't want to upset the balance.

As to childhood, dad wasn't around even when he was around, and after the divorce, mom spent most of her time working and going to shcool to support us.

I've been thinking about this some, and think it isn't really about the sex afterall (should start a new post?). It's about being accepted and recognized.

There was a time I went to mom for help, and she turned me away. I was hurt by it at the time, but since have been telling myself that it was for the better because I persevered on my own. Maybe there's some lingering resentment?

In any event, I just want to get beyond the unhappiness. I have abolutely everything I need (except for a job) and want, and yet I still feel so unhappy.

Need to find the root of all this...