RhysMadison, most days I can't tell which end is up. I just curse along on autopilot hoping that I don't crash somewhere along the way. I don't feel like my talking does any good. It doesn't seem to be helping anything at this point. But I'm one of those people who are always talking. Which is very different from what I used to be. When I was in a deep depression years ago, I didn't leave the house for a year and I would go for days without speaking a word to anyone. So I know from that I have to keep talking. So I'm trying to take care of myself. I'm having to leave tomorrow to go out of town for a training for work. I'm very scared to leave. And I can't deal with the topic of the training. Is just to close to home, but I have to go. Called my T for some help. He said just to leave if it gets to be too much. I just don't want to explain to people at work why I have to leave. I'll just play sick I guess. Is better then having a flashback and trying to attack people who aren't there. But the training is at the lake, so maybe I can escape.