i dont know if i can offer much advice - but i can (hopefully) clarify what your T meant when he said to your daughter that you were sitting right next to her. it's one of the basics of couples therapy, or even just good communication, that you talk to the person you have an issue with, not the third person who is listening in.

kind of like, it should be you and your daughter having a conversation, and your T looking on. if he has a comment to say, he will interject, or maybe make you two pause to reflect on something, but essentially - both you and your daughter should be addressing each other.