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Originally Posted by coconut64
You sounded so hopeful after meeting with the family therapist one on one the other day, what happened?
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I guess I had this expectation that now that the family T had a better picture of my and my daughter's relationship (because he and I met one on one), that the next family session would go much better and that he would work miracles. Yeah, unrealistic, but somewhere inside, I realize now I was thinking things would be better. But they weren't.
My daughter is almost 15, BTW.
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Family therapy sounds really hard, like it has rules of its own.
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Yes, it does seem to, and like individual therapy, no one ever tells you the rules! One of the biggest changes from individual is that in individual, I go in to therapy, choose the direction or topic and off we go. T follows my lead. In family therapy, one person can't do that, because there is the other person to consider. The topic or direction I want may not be the one my daughter wants. So I let the T choose the direction and topic. It is a lot more work for him, but I can't think of any other way. I'm OK with it as long as he is.
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You can't talk to your T about this because he is your D coach?
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Bingo. I worry if he knew the difficulties we were having, it might reflect negatively on the custody decision. So I can't share anything of consequence regarding my daughter with my T.