Trigger warning mention of CSA >>>>>>>>

I was talking with T in session today and went into sharing more about my childhood, not the SA but issues around my dad and his abusiveness with my mom.

My T wants me to create a timeline, and include on it each of the houses I have lived in growing up. She want's me to talk about the rooms in the homes, what I remember about them ect. I told her that I honestly do not remember alot about the rooms in my home till I was almost 11 years of age. In fact I never remember a single bedroom until 11 years of age. She said thats understandable given the trauma's that I experienced in the home.

I was surprised when she mentioned to me that seeing my dad grab weapons and running with my mom away from him were trauma in themself to me. I never thought of it like that, I never even thought about me in those times, more about my mom, I worried alot for her.

I have been all over the place in T. I think I do it to avoid an issue that I have avoided for a long time, the sexual abuse.

I really do want to work through these issues. I told my T at the very end that next time I come in I will share with her my first memory of the sexual abuse when I was 5 years old. I was shaking just thinking about the thought of sharing it with her. I actually came out and told her I was shaking, she said can we do some deep breathing, I said no, I'm ok, it will pass. I'm such an idiot sometimes wanting to do everything myself.

She wants me to do the timeline so she can get an idea of how I got to where I am ect. That I think I can do but all of a sudden I am dreading that I told her I will share my first memory of abuse next session.

Have any of you ever had to do timeline in therapy before, if so did you find it helpful in putting things together for yourself?