((((((complic8d))))))) Thanks for understanding. I think that punishment and abandonment issues are definitely part of it. Good luck to you also.

LMo, OMG I still do that. As a teenager someone told me that I should always accept compliments, because when I argued with them it made the other person feel bad. I can't stand to make someone feel bad, so I made "thank-you" an automatic response to compliments, even if I didn't feel it. I've been slipping on that in the last couple of years. I say I'm sorry constantly, and I do mean it, whether it's my fault or not. Changing my tone - well, 'I'm BAD' really isn't my style, so that one probably wouldn't work for me. Thanks for the idea, and for sharing your experience.