Kayleigh... I think that sometimes we get so used to feeling a certain way that when we start to feel better it's scarry because we're used to feeling bad. The key, if you ask me, is to take things slowly and try to see yourself and your emotions from a neutral point of view. Sometimes we get caught up in the emotions and desires and we're not fully aware of what might happen if we do something such as cutting or being triggered. So take a step aside and clear your mind. Now see yourself as you are now... SI free, feeling good about yourself, and starting to live. Now look at yourself as you were. Granted I didn't know you very well then, nor do I now but my best guess is troubled, depressed, and fighting SI urges... that's pretty much par for the course around here. Anyway, which way is better? Now, imagine what the effects would be if you were triggered? What if it took you months or even years to get back to where you are now? The feelings you have are normal, but it's key to try to understand them and why you have them so you can continue to move forward without major setbacks. I'm so proud of you right now. You've done so well. Now remember this, if you do happen to slip, it's not the end of the world and we'll all be here to pick you up and support you. All of this is only my 2 cents. Take it for what it's worth. So take good care of yourself my dear friend.

Always
Ry