Hum. What a tough question!

I think there are different kinds of relationships. I have some friends that I see a lot, but that I only know a little bit about and who only know a little bit about me. We are in a band together, and our kids are friends, and we have fun. I consider our friendship a relationship, but sort of a light-hearted one, like your husband was talking about.

I have other friends that I have a much deeper relationship with. My best friend knows me so deeply - knows my secrets, knows my feelings, can tell by the sound in my voice if I am having a good day or a bad day (even though my voice always sounds the same to me). We have similar life experiences, similar histories, and just understand each other on a really, really deep level. I probably have a deeper and closer relationship with her than almost anyone else in the world.

My relationship with my H is growing and deepening. We got married young, and have been married for 16 years, but I had my heart closed off for almost all of those years, fearful of being hurt. Gradually, with T, my heart is opening a bit, and our relationship is getting deeper. It's a little scary, and a slow process. He doesn't "get" me the way my best friend does, but I am starting to believe that he does love me, and I'm starting to let the love in.

I have other friends that I am close to on various levels. Some of them know some of my secrets. They are people who are interested in spiritual things, and deeper matters of the heart, and WANT to know people on that deeper level. I think that's part of they key...understanding where the other person is at in terms of how much they want to "know" and how deep the relationship can get.

My deepest relationship is probably with T. And his unconditional love and acceptance of me has opened my heart a bit to relationships with other people.

There is risk in relationships. But for me, the more I take the risks, the more I am rewarded. It is scary to show our "real" selves to people. I certainly don't go around telling my history to just anyone....but over time, I have found some true friends who can know the whole me and it can be okay and healing.

This board has been really good relationship practice for me. I can be honest and true, without the fear of running into someone in the grocery store or whatever. And then when people here are loving and accepting, it makes me feel a little safer with my relationships in real life.

(((((((((((((((((((peaches)))))))))))))))))) What a great question.